The “Oh Shit” Report

You know how you’ll be going along in life and at some point you become aware that pressure is building up deep within your mind? Pressure to do something, to change your life somehow? At first, you feel a bit restless but as the pressure builds, you become flat out uncomfortable. If you are like me, you’ll start inventorying your life and wonder what you’re doing wrong. Finding nothing too terribly out of line, I make a desperate call to my astrologer and ask, “What the hell is going on???”

Inga invariably will say, “Well, let’s look at your transit report.” I can never quite remember what a transit report is but I vaguely recall it being something like an “Oh shit!” report. So I grabbed a book off Inga’s shelf in her office and here’s what I found about transits in “Predictive Astrology – Understanding Transits as the Key to the Future” by Frances Sakoian and Louis Acker: “Transits are, by definition, the aspects formed between the positions of the planets in the heavens at any given time in relationship to the positions of those planets in the natal or birth horoscope. Aspects, transiting or natal, are specific angular relationships that exist between planets in the heavens at any given time.”

Wow, that’s real helpful, NOT! These astrologers are as bad as computer people with the technobabble! All I know is that I’m on the verge of blowing up. So Inga e-mails me the “Oh shit!”, I mean transit, report and as I read it, my jaw drops and hits the floor! It’s like cracking open a Chinese fortune cookie and having this multi-page report fall out that EXACTLY spells out what is going on in your life right now.

Being a natural systems analyst from birth, my logical mind starts racing to figure out how this report based on my natal chart and keyed into the current calendar can be so dead on accurate. The synchronicity of it is staggering! How can my current home and work environments be providing me with the challenges that are detailed in this report? This obviously is something I’m going to have to figure out! In the meantime, what does the report say about all this pressure I’m feeling to change certain areas of my life?

The good news is that the report not only provides a narrative of what my challenges are but also how the planets in my chart are affecting each other. With that information, some of Inga’s handouts and some coaching from her, I can determine what energies I have to work with in facing my current challenges. What does “Transiting Saturn Sesquisuare Radix Midheaven” mean? The text in the transit report states, “Your profession and status can be the focus of much frustration during this time. Perhaps you are waiting for some news of a job change or promotion which entails greater responsibility but which continually seems to be delayed.” Well, there’s no perhaps about it! That is exactly what is going on!

Inga looks at the report and says, “Ooooh! Look at all those Saturn transits! No wonder you’re feeling all that pressure!” I flinch and hoping for the best, I ask, “What’s the big deal about Saturn transits?” She excitedly grabs a book off the shelf, flips to a page and hands it to me to read. “Saturn transits pressure an individual to make the indicated dimension of experience more definite and concrete.” Sounds like a fancy way of saying I have to get my life organized and structured. Damn!

Well, at least now I know what’s bugging me and what I have to work with. Instead of reacting ignorantly, I can shift into pro-active mode and use that Saturn energy to tackle my challenges. For instance, I can meditate after yoga and have Inga take me via astral travel to meet Saturn as an entity so I can ask for his help and guidance. I can wear some Saturn aligned stones that I’ve programmed to assist me with my goals. I can note in my spiritual journal what thoughts are coming to me and what action I’m taking during this difficult phase so I can actually see and review my progress.

Most of all, this approach moves me beyond the “minimize pain/maximize pleasure” mode that we normally operate in and into a transformative / generative state. In that enhanced state, I reach out to collaborate and co-create with other people and entities. I realize that I am not alone or without resources or allies. The mere act of opening up to the possibilities of growth and asking for loving assistance turns challenges and problems into opportunities for miracles. Ah, I’m feeling better all ready! */:-)

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